From this article, men will be able to learn how to properly persuade a girlfriend to engage in anal sex and how to do it right the first time if you are a novice. The following tips are doubly useful in that the author of the article is a woman. Who, if not her, is better to know what bothers the fair sex in this kind of sex.
If people try or even think about anal sex, how do they get a lot of all kinds of negative emotions. So let’s consider this subject objectively. One of the main problems is fear: the fear of pain in both women and men. In addition, the usual reactions are aversion and even a sudden change in feelings towards a partner, caused by the fact that many people do not allow the possibility of associating sexual love with a part of our body that is used for defecation. There is also an imaginary, rather than real, “long hand” of the law, both civil and religious. (In fact, this “long arm” almost never prevents the actions of a “short arm” as long as they both behave prudently, and if we are not talking about minors). In most countries (including Russia), the only “legal” sexual contact is penitenovial sex in a “missionary” position.
Laws condemn many very common sexual practices, such as, for example, oral sex. But anal intercourse is the only form of “unnatural” sex, the name of which originates from the Bible: sodomy. The fact that this kind of sex is often associated with homosexuality and animality makes it more like a crime than anything else, and refers to the so-called category of “abnormal.”
Pornography and porn movies deserve sharp criticism for anal sex. Both books and films leave the erroneous impression that this form of sex is no different from ordinary intercourse. Whatever the case, the heroine invariably “accepts” this without any difficulty; her partner slips into her bulging ass just as easily as he does in the vagina; and the orgasm, which reduces teeth, overtakes her after the first few movements. Viewers and readers who take it at face value, can rush into battle, discarding all caution, and are often so shocked that they always leave a similar idea.
It is known that fear or expectation, or even the fear of something unknown, always cause the sphincter muscle to contract, which controls the anal orifice – the anus (from the Latin anus). This, in turn, protects us from discouraging chance at times of stress. It is also a serious obstacle for those experimenters who wish to get acquainted with anal sex.
But no matter what, many couples, to their delight, found that there should be no taboos in making love. Anal sex is enjoyed by those who approach each other as a male and female porcupine – very carefully.
How not to ask
Fear of anal intercourse begins long before the physical part begins. Many men all of a sudden scare women by how they raise this topic. The first barrier that must be overcome in this game is an understanding of what not to say, so that your partner answers “yes”. Of course, this is the case when the question is posed by a man. If a woman herself invites a man, then everything is clear: go ahead! Most men wait until the very last minute, when it comes to inserting the penis into the vagina during a normal sexual procedure, and then it follows: “How about trying it in the ass this time?”
The first reaction of the woman is a strong fright: she thinks that he is going to make her do it immediately. After all, in the end, between the vagina and the back hole just some 5 centimeters; all he has to do is aim a little lower.
Another bad start: “Have you ever tried this thing in your ass?” If a woman says “no”, she is afraid that it will give her some virgin appeal and make her even more persistent; if she says yes, she gives her partner the green light, regardless of whether she wants it at the moment or not. Perhaps she once tried anal sex and hated it; and maybe she tried it repeatedly with another man and she liked it. But this does not mean that she wants to do this at the moment with this man – that is, with you.
She may have several reasons and is not necessarily offensive to you. Maybe she likes anal sex with little men, and you are too big. Or maybe she just is not very calm at this point about her digestive tract. (Do not forget that women have more problems with this than men, because of their premenstrual gluttony.)
In any case, by confronting her with the need to answer “yes” or “no”, you will achieve that she will be nervous and squeezed, and anal intercourse, more than any other sexual intercourse, requires physical and psychological emancipation.
Act with your little finger
When you do not know what to say – shut up. It may be easy to find out about your woman’s interest without saying a word. Like any other erogenous zone, the anus (both inside and outside) in different women has a different degree of sensitivity. In anal sex, as well as in genital, the pre-game is vitally necessary, so do not spoil your chances by excessive haste. Start stroking her buttocks across the surface and watch her reaction. Does she push her buttocks tight? If so, then she nervously tenses, if her buttocks relax – this is a good sign. Then, starting from the base of the spine, slide your index finger down along her anal hollow. See if she makes a move backwards, trying to pinch your finger between her buttocks? Does she turn over on her stomach, zazyvayusche when you start to feel her rectum? If she does any of this, then your chances grow.
A good way to incline a woman to anal sex is the following: prepare her in the same way as if you were preparing her for parting with virginity in the field of vaginal sex. Almost every woman, before having a real intercourse, experienced the “manual” work of an impatient young suitor. So take her anus through the same logical steps.
A woman who has never had anything from the rear has to be treated the same way you treated a frontal virgin. And do not immediately put your finger in the rectum, knowing that there is no virginal membrane. Imagine what it is. Dampen your index finger with vaginal juices or with your own saliva. It’s easier to use this natural lubricant than suddenly start fussing around it with some kind of jar. Simply, an inexperienced woman in such matters can find a deadly connection between your finger on her anus and a jar of petroleum jelly that you dragged into bed with you, and thus decide that you are going to anal her rape. For this first (introductory) test penetration is best to use your little finger. Your index finger is a welcome guest in the vagina, even in the virgin, but virgin rectum is something else. Remember, in your actions there should be a maximum of gradualness.
Instead of immediately penetrating inside, drag your finger around the folds that form the rim of her anus. You quickly find out whether she likes it or not, because she will begin to squeeze her sphincter muscle, either to help you put your finger inside or to push it out. In this regard, sphincter muscles have great abilities. When the tip of your finger has passed the outer muscular ring, do not start moving your finger back and forth, as you would do in the vagina – the pleasure that a woman gets from anal love is not movement, but the all-encompassing feeling of fullness of space filled with either finger, or penis.
Slowly insert your little finger inward, all the way to the joint, then start making slow circular movements with your entire wrist, without moving your finger back and forth. These movements and pressure will be given to the vagina, as the rectum directly borders on the female genital organs. While you are doing all this, take care to do something else that is not anal – kiss her nipples or caress the navel with your tongue – in order to distract her from thinking: what else do you have anal for? A woman who enjoys every step of anal pre-game just for the sake of this pre-game more naturally ripen to the rest.
Do not hurry.
Now she has completely “tasted” your little finger and is beginning to move away from you, and protesting. When a woman first goes through such a procedure, she usually screams and says, “Oh! Stop doing that! No need! ”- even if, without doubt, enjoys every minute of it. Since childhood, little girls have been told that they have to be picky and graceful – sometimes too. She is afraid that during your thorough research and measurements you will stumble upon something, to put it mildly, unromantic. Even in spite of the fact that she, of course, thoroughly washed her entire body under the shower and took a bath before going to bed, and knows that she is absolutely clean everywhere. Do not make her worried – yield to her immediately: take out your finger, but continue to pre-caress on the outer part. Also kiss her bezel – that is, the bezel of her anus. Gently, but as follows – around, more and more. In addition, in every kiss there is something soothing, no matter where he falls, even if he (with a smack) falls on his ass.
Anilingus, some call it “riming” (reaming) – from Old English “remen”, which means “to reveal a little”. The word “rim” (to encircle, gird) best expresses the essence of this technique, since the outside of the anus is a bezel formed by a ring of folds. Women who have never tried it call it “O-it’s awful!” At least until they try it and, under the able guidance, will love it. A woman should lie on her stomach, spreading her legs wide apart and placing a pillow under her stomach in order to lift herself. Otherwise, a man can break his neck. This position, in addition, provides you with a delightful view of its charms, located lower. Spread her buttocks slightly with your palms. Do not stretch them strongly, otherwise, being excited, you can hurt her. Before concentrating on the anus, carry out a slow lick up and down along her anal gully.
Pay special attention to the crotch: a tough, sinewy, ruble-sized coin that separates the anus from the vagina. This place is extremely erogenous, especially in women who have had an epizotomy – surgery done during childbirth in order to widen the passage. Stitching brings some benefits, making the nerve endings more sensitive in this place. By the way, women should keep in mind (for another moment) that this same part of the man’s body also has increased erogenicity.
When you caress her anus with your tongue, do your tongue with fast circular movements, not forgetting to breathe hotly so that your heavy breathing excites her even more. Just do not “eat in” deeply – just like for other erogenous zones, the rule here is true: the smaller, the better. Obviously, at such a moment – it’s time to properly lubricate it with your own saliva and, at the same time, excite it even more. Yes, it is – very animal, cave species of sex. But, after all, were we not descended from people who actually came out of the caves? Traditionally, the romantic approach is fine, but from time to time a man should play the role of a tender beast for his woman. And if she follows the instructions given in this lesson, he will be pleasantly surprised by the intensity of her excitement in response to his primitive passion. Such a change of places and actions can excite and ignite it like never before.
Many consider this procedure useless, since the language cannot penetrate well inside. Of course, you will not be able to carelessly talk with your tongue all over her gut, right up to her colon, but you can enter your tongue right into the ring of sphincter muscle. An excited woman will help to do this by trying to hold the tip of the tongue for a few seconds – a completely new and unexplored ambivalent feeling.
Finger again, but bigger
Now your partner is relaxed and wet enough to take your index finger. Introduce your finger with gentle circular movements and pause whenever it strains, so that it can prepare itself to receive more length and width. She will feel less “pierced” if she lies in an embryonic position on her side, with her knees pressed against her chest. This position will allow you at the same time to insert your thumb into her vagina; it is useful from a psychological point of view, because as you make your way through the “back door”, you also perform a “normal” procedure. Once your finger has passed the sphincter muscle, do not remove it. The sphincter is a rubicon. Numerous transitions only inflame it. If she feels discomfort, wait, do not remove your finger at all. Any attempt to start over will make her more and more nervous about her ability to accept it.
A woman who manages to take the biggest finger of her man may want to go further, but she is disturbed by completely natural things. First, cleanliness; she doesn’t want to get you dirty; and especially, she does not want to see the state of your penis after – just in the case … well, you never know what … To eliminate this fear, which prevents pleasure, it is easier to use a condom than argue. But, nevertheless, do not forget at the same time be sure to use more additional lubrication. Vaseline, for example, is more suitable than baby cream, as it is thick and gelatinous. Do not regret the lubricant – use it both on your penis and on its anal area.
A woman should kneel, touching her thighs with her breasts; only a big “specialist” can sit on a man from above. Kneel behind your partner’s exposed buttocks, insert the penis between her “cheeks” and gently press his head against her rim. Let the following movements belong to her; ask her, making a rotational movement (as if twirling) with a pelvis, give way to meet you. When she starts to do it, move yourself – but do not push! – forward. Unless you are a real giant, the head of your penis should enter its rectum. Do not assume that the battle is won and do not begin to wield as you would have started while in her vagina. Wait again. Pauses in anal sex are much more important than the active moments.
All this time, maintain a constant flow of gentle verbal encouragement from your partner, constantly letting her know that this is her performance, that you will wait for her every time before you make the next move. (This is exactly the case when you shouldn’t be silent.) Do not hold her hips tightly, as this will make her feel like a trap, and she may be afraid that you suddenly break into her, using your hips as leverage. Instead, find your hands a job on her pubis: if you excite her clitoris enough, then she will be ready to give everything in the world, if only you can enter it by any means.
Since the anus is already any vagina, a man does not need to vigorously move the penis in order to get pleasure. This compactness itself is quite exciting, and such fullness causes pulsations that cannot be felt in a more elastic vagina. In addition, there is a psychological factor that replaces the more active movements of a man: the mere consciousness that you are directly there may be the most powerful of all stimuli. According to generally accepted traditional standards, this territory is still considered as forbidden, and human nature is always inclined to act contrary to prohibitions. During the first few attempts at anal intercourse, you do not need to enter your penis to its full depth. It may take a week, a month or more before you can reach the bottom. It is important to remember the following: let your success build up gradually – a woman who will take one centimeter today may want to take two centimeters next time.
Now that you both are comfortable with this idea, you can take off the condom and do something similar to regular intercourse. Penis strokes are possible in female rectum, but remember that a woman has smaller arms and legs than anything else in men; it also has a smaller rectum. And no matter how much she likes it, she will not be able to withstand the jolts “headlong.” You can enjoy a slow, easy introduction of the penis with swaying movements and a very slow return stroke. However, do not try to “get to the end,” as you do with vaginal intercourse. The cervix is a hard, elastic, stump-like organ, but the gut is more tender.
After certain practices and searches, you will probably find an opportunity to use other positions for anal intercourse …
Unfortunately, there are no known exercises that a woman could do in order to prepare herself for anal intercourse. In Western sex shops special extenders are sold. They have different sizes, and moving from the smallest to the largest – you can prepare yourself for anal sex. But in our Russian sex shops such devices are not observed. Therefore, if you do not go abroad and cannot get extenders there – forget about such training. Some “blue” train themselves with bananas and cucumbers, but I am strictly against this for both sexes. The vagina is closed on the one hand, the rectum is not: it continues to go up, so things can just get lost. By the time the doctor finds and reaches them, the damage can be serious.
Also remember that the smallest protection, caution is worth a full ass of drugs. If you have hemorrhoids, that endure as hard as uttering, then never even think about anal intercourse. Finally, never jump back and forth between the rectum and the vagina, without first washing the penis. Conventional natural vaginal bacteria can resist contact with fecal bacteria.
In fact, anal sex is not at all rude and animal. It may contain the greatest tenderness and consistency of the partners, as it implies a special concern for the comfort and sensations of the woman – such care that no other form of sex implies. The fact that some women try to achieve anal pleasure, despite the fact that they first feel pain, is also proof of the erotic power of anal sex. The lure of virginity dies off with difficulty. Even today, a woman who has deep feelings for a man wants to appear in front of him as a virgin. You can not return the past. If a man is number forty-six, then there is no way to make him number one. However, you can make it “first” if you have never tried anal intercourse before it. Many men find it equally flattering, if not more flattering, than being the first “front”. Since this is proof that she trusts you completely and donates something new as a gift. If a woman has chosen you to experience something like this for the first time with you, you can consider it the highest compliment. This means that you are a special man for her.
The disadvantages of anal act are:
1. Your approach to it, if you are brought up in the spirit that such an act is degenerate and dirty, it will be difficult for you to fully enjoy the anal act.
2. If you have not cleaned up clean, such an act can be quite unpleasant. If you suspect that your partner was bathing for the last time before his graduation party at school, you can always offer to take an exciting bath with you.
3. If, if you remove a member from your anus, he does not wash it, then you have a chance to pick up inflammation of the vagina.
The positive sides of the anal act are:
1. Increases diversity.
2. You cannot get pregnant in this way, so if you forget to take the pills, you are not limited solely to oral sex.
3. If you have a heavy menstrual period, then anal sex will be a good alternative.
4. Anal sex reveals to you a completely different, unexplored world of sensations with new sensual horizons.